Thanks, cat March 21, 2008 ~ 10:57 am
Posted by Julie in : Uncategorized , trackbackI have long suspected that Freddie would be an excellent hunter if given the opportunity. They way he crouches down and waits for an opportunity to pounce, the way he flies out of nowhere to tackle Joe, how he launches himself out from under furniture to grab my feet, all of this shows he’s got a great hunting instinct. I think he lived on the streets for at least a year, so it makes sense- he had to hunt for food, if nothing else.
In my apartment, there really isn’t much opportunity to hunt live prey. We don’t have rodents, the insects are few and far between, and the landlady’s dog is too big to hunt (besides, Freddie would much rather befriend London - he rolls over and shows his belly every time she comes near). He has to content himself with the five million cat toys we have. But this morning, an opportunity apparently arose that apparently couldn’t be resisted.
Before I continue, I have to say that Freddie is a lap cat. If a lap is open, he would like to be there. Especially if you’re sitting on the toilet. I think this goes back to when we first got him and he was confined to the bathroom - toilet sitters having the only accessible laps and all. I am generally okay with this because what the hell, I’m sitting there anyway, I can pet him and give him some attention and he’s happy and doesn’t try to attack Joe if he’s had some attention.
So this morning he hops up on my lap as per usual, and only after a moment do I realize that he has dropped something into my bare lap. A house centipede. I hate these things because 1.) they’re ugly, and 2.) I’m allergic to them. If they bite me, it’s like a spider bite, I get a lump the size of a baseball on my skin and it hurts and is itchy. I repeat, he dropped this on my bare lap, right between my legs. I jumped up and the damned thing went into the toilet and Freddie went flying. I think the centipede was stunned by Freddie’s ferocity and was playing dead, because it didn’t move until it landed in the toilet water, but gah! I’m shuddering now even thinking about it.
I praised Freddie for hunting, because I didn’t want him to think that I wasn’t appreciative (and if he ever finds a cockroach, I would like him to get the fucking thing), but I did tell him that next time, he could just leave it at my feet. Or maybe kill it first. Live presents are not encouraged. Thanks, cat.
Comments
Julie: I think you’re pretty great, you’re smart, funny, snarky, all positive qualities in a female friend. So it is with much sadness that I feel I must say you lost me at letting the cat on your lap while on the toilet.
One of our cats catches a mouse, then talks to it the whole time he chows down on it.
Seriously–wish I could record it because it’s funny as hell to listen to him. It’s like Will Smith dragging the alien thru the desert in Independence Day, stopping here and there to punch his catch.
Oh.My.God. That story has me all itchy and twichy now. Yeuch.
That’s too damn funny. Cat presents can be so interesting.
All of ours will take advantage of the toilet lap; although, I must admit that we’ve never had a present like that! When did your adrenaline stop pumping?
What Aimee said. Yuck.