Julie & Bunsen are going to Hell January 24, 2006 ~ 3:59 pm
Posted by Julie in : Random Insanity, Urban Family , trackbackFrom an email conversation Regan and I just had:
Regan: What is this country coming to, I ask ya?
Julie: It’s coming to JESUS, my friend. Come to Jesus.
Regan: Dude, I GO to church. Never ONE MENTION of anal sex OR sex toys. I’m thinking he’s OK with them. Seems like he spent most of his time pointing out the hypocrisies of the self-righteous religious leaders of the day. hmmmm…..interesting….
Julie: Did I say GO to Jesus? No. I said COME to Jesus. Big difference. Huge. And they did not have vibration technology when Jesus was around. Hence the lack of sex toys in the Bible. But there ARE mentions of anal sex. Remember Sodom and Gommorah?
Regan: That’s OLD Testament shit. And I think Mary Magdalene probably made use of a conveniently shaped and carefully smoothened olive branch on occasion. That’s in “bible outtakes” at the end.
Julie: What, you think they forgot about anal sex between the old testament and the new? Dude, those people lived a looooong time. I bet when Jesus was a boy there was some old guy sitting around the front stoop saying “Boy, you should’ve seen Sodom! Those guys knew how to part-AY!” That’s also in the Bible outtakes section. The Bible: As Re-Told By Julie and Regan.
Regan: Also featured n outtakes was when Judas gets hit in the crotch by a baseball. Then there’s the popular “Apostles Gone Wild” video series.
Julie: And the Last Supper Keg Stand.
Conclusion: We’re SO going to Hell.
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