Freddie says Relax April 9, 2007 ~ 10:50 am
Posted by Julie in : Da Cats , comments closedFreddie loves everyone. Freddie has never met someone he doesn’t like. Freddie would probably love even the possums in the fields, if given the chance. He follows us from room to room, to see what we’re up to, what we’re doing, and if there is the slightest chance he’s going to get food out of it. Because when push comes to shove? What he really loves is food (this is why he would love the possums in the field - hey! food!).
I can understand this. If I was only being fed three ounces of raw food twice a day, I would want more food as well. The first day we let him out of the bathroom, he raided Joe’s food bowl. I was not there, so only Rick knows how much he ate on top of the small handful of Purina One that I had already given him. It was enough to give him diarrhea. So yesterday we scaled back. Only raw food, Joe’s food bowl was put up out of sight. Freddie didn’t have diarrhea yesterday, but Joe was understandably grouchy - he’s used to being able to nosh when he feels like it, not when I’ve put Freddie in the bathroom for five minutes.
At about 9 last night, after he’d been fed for the night, Freddie decided that he was interested in the cake I was eating. Okay, good a time as any to table train him. I told him no and removed him from the table many many times, but eventually it seemed to work and he left me alone. He might have just been bored, though, because he started aggravating Joe right about then, too. I praised Freddie for doing a good job. I put him down, and about five minutes later, I hear that he’s into something on the kitchen table. I turned around, and my little chowhound was trying to get the Saran Wrap off of the cake pan. Um, no. We don’t roll like that.  I moved the cake to the counter so he couldn’t get it.
Today, I mixed in some Purina One with his raw food. Cross your fingers that it works out, because if we don’t get this cat onto dry food which I can leave out all day, there is going to be trouble. If not from Freddie, then from Joe, who is going to show us all the true meaning of “pissed off.”
Special Easter Post April 8, 2007 ~ 9:49 am
Posted by Julie in : Random Insanity , comments closedSince my version of celebrating Easter this year was to make a funfetti cake and dub it “The Resurrection Cake (hey, it rose in the oven), I will leave you with a post from several Easters ago (March 31, 2004 to be exact) while I go to rehearsal. No rest for the wicked, especially on religious holidays.
“How To Kill A Peep”
Peeps are all over the place. When I was younger, they only came in yellow chick-shapes, but now they are a rainbow of colors and a universe of shapes. There have been several posts today about the evil that is a Peep, and they reminded me of an experiment performed at my house last year to see what exactly it takes to kill a Peep.
Used for experiment: several of the classic yellow chick-shaped Peeps. Nothing fancy for us.
1st method used: Water. We were’t picky, we wanted to see if the Peep would melt if submerged. Stuck said Peep in a water glass for three minutes, completely submerged as I held it down with my fingers. While I liked drowning the Peep, my satisfaction was short lived in that the water did absolutely nothing to the Peep. Moved onto…
2nd method used: Vinegar. Dumped water out of the glass and filled it with apple cider vinegar, because it was the only kind we had in the house. None of us being chemists, we figured that maybe the acid in the vinegar would kill the Peep. It sure seems to discourage the ants I sometimes find building homes outside my apartment building. Same procedure with vinegar. Hold Peep submerged beneath surface. This time after three minutes, the yellow seemed to come off a little, but the Peep was still generally intact. This called for serious measures…
3rd method used: Microwave. I remembered making s’mores in the microwave when I was younger, and how the marshmallows would always balloon to three times their normal size. Half the fun was seeing how long you could keep them in the microwave before they exploded. Upon further recollection, this part was ony fun for me and my friends. My mother was not thrilled with the prospect of a marshmallow-covered microwave. At any rate…stuck a new Peep on a small plate, and stuck it in the microwave for some time (I can’t remember the exact amount of time, we were more obsessed with getting it out before it popped). Peep became distended, as if it were suffering from a really bad case of gas. When we took it out of the microwave, the Peep shrunk back to normal size, looking only slightly the worse for wear. However when we tried to scrape it off the plate, we ran into problems. Apparently the yellow sugar/marshmallow mixture turns into something about the same consistency as super glue. Eventually the majority of the Peep was removed, but the yellow sugar coating never came completely off. I think the roommate threw it out. Still, no death for the Peep. Time for trial by…
4th method used: Fire! Skewered a new Peep with a shishkabob stick. Lit it on fire with a regular cigarette lighter. At first, nothing much happened, but eventually the yellow coating disappeared. After several minutes, we extinguished the Peep, only to find that it still had eyes! That’s right, the candy coating was gone, but the Peep was looking at us and accusing us of attempted Peep-icide! I couldn’t take the guilt, and threw this Peep out. This concluded our experiments.
Theory: Peeps do not die. I don’t know what they do when the stomach acid hits them after they are eaten, but I’m pretty sure they don’t get fully digested. Even if I could have eaten them before the experiments, which I couldn’t, there is no way in hell I could eat them after. Peeps will still be around when all that is left of this planet are the cockroaches. Peeps and cockroaches will mate and their hybrid sugar-covered spawn will rule the universe.
Settling in April 6, 2007 ~ 9:40 am
Posted by Julie in : Da Cats , comments closedFinal confirmation that Malik was a stupid name for a cat: I told Thabs that’s what the cat’s old name was and he said “Hmmm…that’s pretentious.” Exactly. TFFKAM is responding well to being called Freddie, although sometimes when he is being a ball of mush I look at him and think “Are you really a Freddie?” And then I pet him someplace he doesn’t really want to be petted and he nips me with his teeth or claws and I think “From lovey boy to bitch in two seconds flat, yes, yes you are a Freddie.” And somewhere above, Freddie Mercury is laughing at me and the cat.
Freddie the cat found his voice last night while stuck in the bathroom. I’m keeping the cats separated for the time being to make the transition a little easier, and apparently Freddie wanted to be out with the rest of us instead of cooped up in there. He started beating on the door with his paws and then yowled at intervals. He would give a few meows and stop to listen if anyone was coming. The silence for a few minutes, then more meows. At one point I opened the bathroom door enough for him to see Joe and they just sniffed at each other through the door. No hissing, growling, or anything, despite what the clinic vet tech told me - I think Freddie just didn’t like the clinic. Can’t say as I blame him, he was in a smallish cage for a while surrounded by other unhappy cats. They treat them well there, but who could be really happy in a situation like that?
The one slight snag we have is that Freddie has been placed on a raw food diet, which apparently straightened out his diarrhea while he was at the clinic. But raw food, it is expensive. A four pound bag of it cost me $18.50 last night, and it will probably last two weeks. We’ll give him a couple of days to adjust to the new surroundings and then start transitioning him over to the Purina One that Joe eats. I know some people are very into the raw food diet or wet food diet for their cats, but we just can’t afford that stuff. If the option is 65 cents for a can of cat food that will last one day, or $5.99 for a bag of dry that will last weeks, well, you do the math. Joe’s been on Purina One for 15 years with no problems, it will be just fine for Freddie as well.
And now onto work…I’m only here until 3 today - Jesus died not only for our sins, but so we could leave work early! (And if you took offense to that, chill. It was a joke. Later I will write about my knowledge of Jesus relying largely upon “Godspell.”)
General half-assedness. April 5, 2007 ~ 10:27 am
Posted by Julie in : Da Cats , comments closedI’ve been kicking around blog posts for a few days, but I just don’t have the energy to write them. It’s sad when I can’t even muster up the energy to write a post about why I’m addicted to reality shows like “Little People, Big World” and “Deadliest Catch.” I just feel like they’re head and shoulders above shows like “Survivor” and “The Apprentice.” Because in the end, I care about the Roloff family, I care about the crew of the Northwestern, I couldn’t give a shit less that Trump is making people degrade themselves and sleep in tents to be his apprentice. Hey, that post was easier than I thought it was. Tomorrow I will do a similarly half-assed one about why I don’t think I could vote for Hillary Clinton, even though she is a woman and I generally like to support other women.
Today I am trying to get the last of my audits done so that I can get out of here at 3 with a clean conscience to prepare the bathroom for its new resident, TFFKAM, who is going to be picked up at 6:30. Finally. I will then have this evening, tomorrow evening, Saturday and Sunday evenings with him, and then we go into tech for the show I’m working on. Which means Julie will pop by the apartment briefly each night next week, then go to tech rehearsals until 11. Perhaps by the end of the weekend I’ll be able to allow the cats to mingle so they can keep each other company while I’m gone. We’ll see.
There is some light April 2, 2007 ~ 11:58 am
Posted by Julie in : Fambly, Random Insanity, Rick , comments closedThere is a long story behind this, but I don’t have the energy or the inclination to type it. Rick’s sister had a large malignant mass removed from her throat late last week. Yesterday we got the news that while there is still some cancer on her larynx, the doctors are going to treat it with chemo and radiation rather than removing her voicebox. She is being released from the hospital today and so far we are cautiously optimistic - at our darkest points last week, we were sure we were going to hear “She has ____ amount of time to live.” Since we weren’t told that, we’re hopeful.
Another bit of light that’s peering at me from the end of the tunnel is that my little inmate, The Feline Formerly Known As Malik, has been given a clean bill of health - I could have told them he was fine after I saw him almost hurl himself from a perch 7 feet about the ground to get food that was being brought in for another cat, but what the hell. I don’t know when I’m going to get him yet - I’m trying to get hold of a car for the pick up, but in all likelihood, he will be in the apartment by the end of the week. Learning to respond to a name that is not Malik. And eventually, to share food with Joe.
