Sage has been campaigning for most of a year to get a helix piercing in her cartilage for her 15th birthday. “Amelia got one on her 15th birthday!” was a frequent line of reasoning. Never mind that her father told her when she got her earlobes pierced at age 13 that those were the only piercings she would get. Never mind that those holes had mostly closed up because she never wore earrings in them. Never mind that Amelia’s helix piercing is the only piercing she has – she never got her lobes done because everyone else already did and that girl is nothing if not independent.
I told Sage that if her mom and dad capitulated, I would take her. They did, and I did (Rick came too, since she is under 18 and needed parental consent and I am not legally a parent). We went to the same place where I got my navel and rook piercings, and where we took Amelia to get her helix piercing almost three years ago (damn, time flies!). I went into the back room with Sage for moral support. I asked her if she wanted to hold my hand while it was done. “There’s no shame in it. I held someone’s hand when I got my piercings done, Amelia held my hand when she got hers done,” I told her. “Amelia is a wuss,” Sage proclaimed. She graciously forbore to say the same thing about me. “Okay, then,” I said, and just stood back.
She got marked for the piercing, okayed its position, and then she got pierced. No problem, the kid didn’t turn white, she didn’t look faint, she was a real trooper as the piercing artist put the ring in. She looked in the mirror and gushed, “It’s so cool!” Since she was taking it so well, I asked if we could stick around a few more minutes so I could get another hoop for my own helix piercing. She agreed and gleefully went off to show her dad, who was waiting in the main shop area.
I was paying for my new hoop when I heard a tremendous thud. I looked over my shoulder and saw Sage on the floor, with Rick crouched beside her. Five minutes after she was pierced, the shock of it had caught up with her, and she hit the decorative steel plating on the floor like a ton of bricks. I ran over in time to have her look at me and say in wonder, “Did I just pass out?” Why yes, grasshopper, yes you did. The piercing artists were awesome about the whole thing, sat her down in front of the airconditioner and gave her a lollipop to raise her blood sugar while I ran downstairs to get Gatorade from the bodega. When I got back, Rick went out to get the car, and pretty soon we were on our way to her apartment, not much the worse for wear except for a bump on her head.
Turns out this was the first time she had ever passed out and she while she didn’t like the whole process, she did like being able to say she had passed out. It made the story, so to speak. I told her it probably would have been better if she hadn’t told me that Amelia was a wuss, since Amelia had not passed out after her piercing, but I was informed that was not the point. The official story is that for Sage’s 15th birthday she got a helix piercing, and she passed out. And it was LEGEN-wait-for-it-DARY.
